so, can you please listen.

sometimes we are trying to pick what we think is the best thing for the best people in our lives. but we are humans. we make mistakes.

how it hurts me so bad. how i love u too much.

well, this is kind of random. i'm not supposed to write it down right here but i just currently don't have any idea who i can talk to.

this year supposed to be my mighty 20. well IT IS :D.
however the unpredictables happened. his nightmare becomes mine.
now it is worse than no flowers on my graduation day.

i ever wish that i could turn back time, but then i look upon my baby boy and know that GOD HAS THE BEST PLAN. it's just the circle of life :'). maybe i've been on the top for too long, now i have to go down for a while. life is not easy , but u know.. i'm the luckiest girl on earth! :p. i have the best people around me and i know i'll be the best one too. wish me more luck ;)

and for you my dearest. you might not know how it hurts me so deeply. but don't worry i'll try to hold on. i know u've had enough. i hope u know that i had more than enough. but still, i love you. i always do. and i know we can go through this.

ugh. randomness xD

first post of the year?

hey hey heyyy, i'm still alive :D

it is 4th of May and i cant believe this is my first post of the year.. WOOHOO!! XD


well, guess what, lots of miracles been happening in my life lately (well, i'm always blessed with miracles and that's what makes me think i am the luckiest. but lately there r just more of it that i can't be more grateful and thankful to God for everything so amazing God has gave and keep giving to me).

firstly, I'm going to have a baby!! we r going to have a baby!! xD
this is just so exciting and i really cant wait for august. yes. thats the estimated due date. i hope me and my hubby can be a cool pair of parents for him :). wish us luck.

second highlight is i'm going to graduate this sem!!
after all the pain in the ass (read: killer assignment) that i've been through the whole sem, finally the lecturer said that everyone is safe. means that we are going to pass the paper. well, hopefully.

but seriously, when the lecturer said that we r safe, i was so damn relieved. basically because he has been putting everyone into worries and depression saying that the assignments were not good enough and he keeps making us doing correction. but i guess he's cool, seriously :). despite the pressure he had been giving, we did our best.

and those are the best parts, there's the sad part too :(
graduation means farewell most of the time rite?, many of my friends have gone back home for good, though it's not impossible for us to meet again, but it sure will be more difficult for us to see each other as often as when we were here, going through the good and the bad times together. college days are precious :). oh well, in conclusion, i love graduation but farewell isn't fun x(.

well, thats all for today, i guess i've been writing too much :)

cya <3

hi again :p

hellooo there.. *ergh. i believe there is no one here anymore.. lol.. this blog has been so dead for like months.. well, whatever, i just feel like writing. xp

okay, actually, i do still check out my blogspot account everyday. yes. everyday. but what i've been doing was just checking on those blogshops updates.. :D. and nothing else.

and now, driven by boredom, i'm here again. writing nonsense .. lol
hmm.. actually i dunno what i'm here for, dun even know what should i write.. =.=

oh yes *finally found a topic. teehee

okay, so i've been addicted to Owl City's songs lately.. been listening to them for hundred times a day.. >.<
and here are my favs song of Owl city.. (err.. i guess i'll just give u the link.. the connection is so lousy. cant download the vid. =.=")

okay so here they are

Fireflies

Rainbow Veins


oh yeeaaa.. FYI only. i'm just married *blush..
and i still cant believe.. i'm only 19 and married.. hahahaha.. what a lucky girl i am :)

and i guess u know who is the lucky guy (or not so lucky guy? lol) if, only IF u do read my whole blog.. xP

yes, he is Panji Azis.. the man i've been dating for like 4 years.. means since i was 15.. :)
and u dont have any idea how happy i am when the most beautiful dream that i havent even dare to dream about comes true.. it's just perfect..

well, i guess i have to go somewhere else.. i have to re-build my farm in farmville.. it is being kinda messed up since i left it alone... XD

okay then, thats all for todayyyyy..

cya <3

dear diary

dear my sweet blog..
i'm so sorry for neglecting u for soooo loongggg.. i didnt mean it, i just didnt have enough time to take care of you.. to tell u stories that i've been through..

well, okay, i'll stop lying now.
i have plenty of time. plentyyy.
but my lazy-ass syndrome was just being too hard to handle. i havent even started my assignment.. the bloody synoptic..

gosh. i really need some inspirations.
i've been playing around too much and i know i'm going to regret every single minute that i spent for nothing. but still.. i dun know why, even i realize there's no much time left, i still cant move on.. someone please help me.. T.T
i really need some lazy-ass theraphy.
can anyone heal me. cure me? please..

lagi2..lagi2..

oke.. hari ini gw ceritanya pake bahasa indonesia yg baik dan benar aja ye.. berhubung sebentar lagi gw bakal ngerjain 2 tugas yg masing2 4000 kata pake bahasa nyamnyam.

mari mulai..
jadi gini ya.. laptop gw tuh sekarang gw taroh di deket jendela gitu.. secara mejanya adanya disitu..(kamar gw biar kata master room tetep aja seupil.. jadi barang2 segede gambreng gabisa ditata ulang sembarangan).. nah.. secara siang2.. maka kaca jendela gw buka,, tapi untuk menghindari pantulan ke laptop, gordennya gw tutup.. dan di deket gorden itu ada bermacam2 barang2..

lalu tiba2 angin bahorok datang.. dan gorden gw pun ikut melambai ke dalem gitu.. terus.. praaaangggg.. lampu tidur merah gw.. pecah.. lagi.. padahal baru aja beli beberapa bulan yg lalu untuk menggantikan lampu tidur kuning yg pecah (juga) gara2 gw senggol.. huahauhauahuahauhaua

bikin gw kesel aja.. orang mau ngerjain assignment aja lagi males setengah mampus.. ini malah bikin kerjaan.. bikin gw beresin beling yg berhamburan di lantai T.T

ckckck.. tapi kalo di inget2.. ini bukan pertama kalinya kejadian menyebalkan semacam itu terjadi di kamar gw..

waktu itu gw pernah lagi asik2 makan abon gloria yg baru gw buka di depan laptop.. terus.. tiba2.. tangan gw kehilangan keseimbangan.. dan.. toplesnya jatoh..huhuhuhuhuu..
menyebabkan setengah kaleng abon itu bertaburan di lantai.. di lantai yg baru aja gw bersihin kemarennya.. T.T

terus waktu itu juga pernah.. gw pergi lupa nutup kaca jendela gitu.. tiba2 ujan deres banget.. pas gw pulang.. banjir kamar gw..nyamnyamnyam

apalagi yah kira2.. gehehe.. ntr deh gw update kalo gw inget..

dadaah :)

learning to be patient

oh, how can i?
maybe the title should be changed into 'learning not to be angry when ppl taking you for granted'
how would u feel if u did a favor for someone and she/he just walked away without saying thank you or anything that represents her/his appreciation.
how would you feel if u pick someone up and at the end she is just walk away as if u were a taxi driver.. not waiting for you to lock up the car, to prepare.. while u did wait for her to prepare..
how would u feel if that shit happened thousand times

am i wrong to be angry??